5/6/2023 0 Comments Home alone 4 mike weinbergI’m not even going to share my thoughts on Santa Jaws, I’m just going to explain the plot. Santa Jaws (2018) Directed by Misty Talley Starring: Reid Miller, Courtney Lauren Cummings, Hawn Tran In one particular scene that may be the funniest in the film for all of the wrong reasons, the legendary Al Pacino does a commercial for Dunkin’ Donuts where he sings about the all-new “Dunkachino”. Perhaps a better name for this film would be ‘the hour and a half long advertisement’ with all of the products that are constantly being promoted on screen. Most of the jokes revolve around poorly executed slapstick, bodily functions and ‘funny’ noises. There is little I can say that hasn’t already been said about Sandler’s comedies. Drag is a celebrated tradition in cinema with many actors delivering memorable and/or empowering roles in the attire, however, watching Adam Sandler stuff literal melons into his bra as some form of crude humor would unfortunately convince many of the contrary. The only thing worse than Adam Sandler acting in one of his comedies would be Adam Sandler acting in one of his comedies while he plays another separate character in drag. While I know it’s more of a holiday movie rather than a Christmas movie, that’s not going to stop me from talking about this piece of flaming hot garbage. Jack and Jill (2011) Directed by Dennis Dugan Starring: Adam Sandler, Katie Holmes, Al Pacino I swear Home Alone 4 makes my head feel like somebody just chucked a brick at it. To add to the confusion, the character ‘Marv’ acted and dressed exactly like the other robber, Harry, despite there being no character named Harry in this film. Combine this with the fact that the actor playing Kevin was some inferior Macaulay Culkin and the actor playing Marv was not Daniel Stern. The traps are what made the movies fun in the first place, so one could imagine my dismay when in Home Alone 4 there appeared to be no more than…five traps? None of them were fun or interesting. There were always so many of them and they were always so creative, funny, and… well, violent. As a child, my favorite parts of the Home Alone movies were the traps. Lastly, there’s Home Alone 4, which accomplishes the miraculous by making Home Alone boring. Then there is Home Alone 3, which despite watching, I cannot recall a single detail of. The first Home Alone is one of my favorite Christmas movies and its sequel doesn’t fall far behind. Home Alone 4: Taking Back the House (2002) Directed by Rod Daniel Starring: Mike Weinberg, French Stewart, Missi Pyle If you still choose to watch them, don’t come crying to me. Regardless, there are some Christmas movies that are so bad they should be buried in a deep dark pit where even the ghost of Christmas past couldn’t find them. Perhaps it’s because I find them too cheerful, maybe it’s because they’re so ubiquitous, possibly it’s because I’m Jewish. I am not a fan of most Christmas movies, one might call me a Grinch.
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